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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26406952">Lessons in Elf Management</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/alternatedoom/pseuds/alternatedoom'>alternatedoom</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>World of Warcraft</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crying, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Goblins, Homophobic Language, Humor, I'm Going to Hell, Kink Meme, M/M, Not Beta Read, POV First Person, Physical Abuse, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sexism, Sexual Coercion, Sexual Violence, Shame, Situational Humiliation, Verbal Abuse, Warcraft Kink Meme</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2016-01-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2016-01-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 11:49:05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,375</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26406952</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/alternatedoom/pseuds/alternatedoom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>He was rude. It was typical.</p><p>What he didn't know was, I specialize in attitude adjustments.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jastor Gallywix/Original Male Character</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Lessons in Elf Management</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Prompt was: <i>Gallywix (don't judge) with any male. Surprise me. They could be from the Alliance for all I care. At first, the receiver talks back to Gallywix, calls him names and all that jazz, but upon being backhanded by Gallywix (all those gold rings, man), he becomes compliant. He's ashamed of himself for what's going down and doing his best to stay quiet but Gallywix is enjoying his ass off, chilling in his seat, arm behind his head and cigar in the other hand with the receiver straddled on his lap.</i></p><p>
  <i>Dirty talking, the receiver being forced to look Gallywix in the eyes despite his embarrassment, cigar smoke being blown in the receiver's face/using the receiver as an ashtray, humiliation/disgust-induced tears... that's the shit I do like. I have a thing for rich, self-absorbed jerks, so emphasis on that would make me extremely happy and forever grateful.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>(This is my first time posting to one of these so hopefully I did it right, lol.)</i>
</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Look, I'm not running a charity here. You want solid life and career coaching, go buy my autobiography. MAKE SURE YOU PAY FOR IT. Do not even THINK about buying it used or I'll make sure your face gets used pal. But I'll tell you a little something for posterity since legal counsel says we can't monetize this story or the other twenty-something exactly like it.</p><p>And also* because babe, you got me all wrong. I'm a nice guy! Ruthless, yeah, and unsparing, those are fair. And sure I don't hesitate to lie, cheat, steal, or stab someone, anyone, in the back if there's a profit to be turned. And I don't take any guff, lip, or general disrespect unless I'm in the process of manipulating someone, and I always make sure to show myself a good time first and foremost.</p><p>But aside from all that, I'm a mensch. Generous with my bribes, merciless with my enemies. If you don't see qualities to emulate here, frankly, you're doing it wrong.</p><p>So I get a lotta visitors, right, on account of being Trade Prince. Lots of couriers of all races. On one pretty average morning into my office came this elf. And I looked him up and down. He looked the same as all the other blood elves I've ever seen ever. Bit tall. Long blonde hair in a ponytail, the fel-tainted eyes, that standard snooty expression they all got. Especially the young ones, and all the messengers from Silvermoan are young. Some of the older elves got gravitas, presence, halfway respectful s.o.b.'s like Lor'themar. But the couriers Astalor sends are mostly disrespectful little pretty boys. This one was maybe in his 40's or 50's, which makes me a cradle robber by their crazy standards, but I've thought it through and I can live with that.</p><p>I picked up my tumbler of single malt Gobfiddich scotch, I don't think I need to tell you that it was exquisitely aged, and I took a sip, still checking him out. Not that I really needed to do that either. If you don't mind elves, you don't often see an elf you don't like, if you know what I mean. And by the expression on his face, I'd already decided what I was going to do with him.</p><p>He stared down his nose at me and tossed the folded and sealed message on my desk. "Trade Prince."</p><p>He was rude. It was typical.</p><p>What he didn't know was, I specialize in attitude adjustments.</p><p>"Hellooo fresh meat," I said, and grabbed a handful of his ass. To be honest there wasn't much to grab. The girl elves are usually waifs that got some booty, not goblin quality booty mind you, but a little something there, but the boy elves are all flat-assed. I don't know what they're feeding them up north in the Eastern Kingdoms but it can't be good.</p><p>"How dare you?!" he practically shrieked.</p><p>"Like you said, I'm the Trade Prince," I drawled, and I quick let go of his ass and snagged him by the fancy orange sash. I jerked him closer to get him off balance in more ways than one.</p><p>It worked.</p><p>"Let go of me!" he said, stumbling, all high-pitched, outraged, typical haughty bullcookies. Slapped at my hand, even, but I didn't let go.</p><p>"Bzzt, nope, that's not what we're doing. Take off your pants," I told him, totally calm. I'm always calm while they lose their shit. Which he did in a spectacular elfy fashion. The standard ranting ensued, "How dare you, you little toad," and that sort of thing, repeating himself a lot, plus a few garbled Thalassian swears, and what is the point of swearing at someone in a language they don't speak? Defeats the purpose, I tell ya. Disgusting, despicable, worm, beneath him, how dare I. Etc.</p><p>He tried to slap me in the face then, but I caught him by the wrist and slapped him a couple of times instead. He screeched when I reached up and grabbed a handful of his ponytail and pulled him down to the level of my chair. Little pansy elves, all those braids and ponytails and free-flowing mops, the vanity is what gets them every time. He landed hard on his knees, and I stared him in the eye to let him know I meant business. You can take anyone and anything down if you know where and how to hit. The thing about elves is, you gotta show them who's boss right away.</p><p>"If you don't shut your little bitch mouth, I'm gonna lock you in my dungeon, which while artfully decorated with skeletons is not nearly as posh as the rest of this place, and then I'm gonna notify Orgrimmar we caught you on the border selling state secrets to an Alliance scout. I got dozens of guys'll swear up and down to anything I tell them to. You got any idea what Garrosh does to traitors?"</p><p>He gaped at me. They always do!</p><p>"You wouldn't--" he began, all horrified.</p><p>I used his ponytail as leverage again to yank him closer and shut him up mid-sentence. I held out my other hand, painting the picture for him. "Or," I said. "I could put in a good word for you with Astalor. Best courier ever, so professional. Probably getcha a promotion."</p><p>He stared at me with this mouth open. Oh, it was a pretty mouth, and I stopped gesturing to stick a finger in it. He looked aghast, but his lips closed almost automatically, and I felt his tongue quiver under my finger.</p><p>"Probable promotion, who knows, the regent lord might even hear your name... or Garrosh Hellscream all pissed at you. What's it gonna be?"</p><p>I saw him wavering, and he blushed, it was cute! and he finally shucked his pants off, avoiding my eyes. Whatever. I undid my fly with one hand, how's that for skill toots, and pulled his head by his hair down into my lap. I pressed my cock into his cheek and he knelt in front of me looking shell-shocked.</p><p>Boom. I am the master. Easy as an explosion, I got it down to a science. I lit a fresh cigar and puffed a little in his face. "Get my cock real wet, cause I don't have anything special to put on it."</p><p>I did, truth be told, have something to put on it, but an asshole feels better coming down with a little extra friction.</p><p>Even then he seemed real reluctant to put his mouth on my package. Everyone makes jokes about male elves all being twinks, tossing salad, riding the carousels, dancing around the Midsummer ribbon pole, whatever euphemism you like, but I can confirm plenty of em are as straight as they come.</p><p>"We both know you're gonna suck this," I told him, and when he made a face I smacked him around a little again, and his eyes filled with tears. "C'mon, put this between those pretty pink lips. Get to it."</p><p>He didn't go as fast as I like, so I pushed his head down. He choked, but I didn't let up. It's not even that big! Well, I mean, it's a good size, but it's not THAT big. My point is, these candy-ass elves always play it up for sympathy.</p><p>I let him blow me for a while, get me nice and wet. He wasn't real practiced with his technique, but he was getting the job done. That's what I like about elves, their instincts are a thing of renowned beauty, so even the inexperienced ones can show you a pretty good time.</p><p>"You want me to come in your mouth?" I asked.</p><p>"Yes," he pleaded as I let him come up for air. Adorable little liar, he just wanted it over.</p><p>"Beg me to," I said.</p><p>"Please, please come in... in my mouth!" He wiped some of his tears away. "I want you to," he said weakly, voice quavering. Lackluster performance overall, I give it a 3/10.</p><p>"Yeah? You want me to use your nasty cum receptacle here?"</p><p>"Yes, yes!"</p><p>But I wasn't going to come in his mouth, because flat or not, dat ass. "Too bad, cause I ain't gonna." He groaned when I tugged on his hair again, directing him up, and he was real lithe as he slid into my lap. That's another thing I like about elves, they move real nice, even disconcerted. Graceful, like a race of goddamn ballerinas.</p><p>Don't think elves have the ballet though, ballet is a human thing and a goblin thing. Elves have a lot of picnics, though they call them 'festivals' to dress em up. We can't all be cultured. </p><p>Shame too, cause with most of them dead they got all that extra space in Silvermoon. A few times it's occurred to me I should bring the beauty of the ballet to the elves. Most people would say there's not a lot of gold to be made in pushing cultural change, but most people don't know how to properly burn a place down for the insurance money. (Hint: you don't just splash kerosene around and light a match. There's an art to it. But since you're not paying to hear trade secrets here that's all I'm gonna say about that.)</p><p>Anyway, I took a puff of my cigar and put my other hand behind my head, leaning back a little to balance against the weight of him straddling my thighs. He was kinda heavy from the sheer size difference, y'know, but I don't mind. Though I learned the hard way not to fuck orcs in this position. We all gotta learn, right? I fully subscribe to the belief it's better to regret the things you did than the things you didn't do.</p><p>His eyes filled with fresh tears as he nestled my cock up to his hole.</p><p>"Look at me, you little slut cocksucker," I told him, and it startled him enough that he did. "You give it up so easy," I added, and he looked ashamed. "Come on baby, push down that ass."</p><p>He bore down and made the kind of grimace you'd make if you took a round from a Kickback 5000 to the gut. But hey, no pain, no gain. Pain for him, gain for me, obviously. I hear it really hurts to be a newbie taking it in the ass, but they usually get over it after a little while. He let out a whimper, biting at his lips, and he started to rock a little, but in movements that were sad abbreviated excuses for anal.</p><p>"Faster kid, this is dull," I said, and I slapped his asscheek a few times. "Chop chop, I got shit to do."</p><p>I didn't, least nothing I couldn't put off for Elf Time(tm) (okay I don't have Elf Time(tm) fully trademarked yet but I'm doing the paperwork later today and you won't cross me if you know what's good for you. Did I mention I have a shark tank in the dungeon?)</p><p>The truth was it was anything but dull, I was loving every minute of it. So I sat back and smoked and watched him while he worked my cock. That's what life is all about. Enjoying the moment.</p><p>And he did speed up... a little. "Faster, jeez, a forsaken fucks better than this," I said.</p><p>The shame on his face increased, but he started to really move his ass, it was much better. You wanted to pinch those rosy cheeks! But I needed a hand stroking my balls right then, so between my extremely fine cigar and my enormous nads, both hands were full. I like to cup em, weigh em in one hand. Tug and pet em a little, feel the tautness in the skin between the pull of my hand and the up and down of whatever orifice my dick happens to be in. Felt pretty good. Good way to start a Wednesday.</p><p>And doll, don't judge about the forsaken. You show me someone who claims they never thought about it and I'll show you a liar. In fact, the ones who are loudest with horror at the very idea are usually the ones choking it to a stash of undead bone porn every night.</p><p>Or judge away, to be honest I don't give a macaroon.</p><p>"Yeahh, that's better, you nasty boywhore," I said. "That's nice, squeeze that cock, yeah. Like that. Ohh yeah. I said look at me, you cute little cumrag."</p><p>He kept the new and improved pace up, and clamped down, and kept his gaze up, doing what he was told no problem now, and I let go of my balls cause that sad tearstained cheek badly needed to get pinched. He didn't like that, and so I reached back and tweaked a fingerful of his ass for good measure. Not hard, only enough to make my point. Elf boys, like I said, you gotta put em in their place and keep em there. If you manage them right, they're a real special kinda fun. Mine are always meek as lambs by the time I'm done with them.</p><p>In that spirit, I pulled out of his ass and pushed his head down with the hand that was holding my cigar, flicked some ash on him, luckily didn't set his hair on fire (been there too and that's a bad scene, nobody has a good time when they flail around and my desk catches on fire), and stroked myself off with the other hand until I shot all over his face and shirt. Nice orgasm too. Came pretty hard, saw stars and cocktails and cars and stacks of gold coins, all that crap.</p><p>Course I never actually put in a good word for any of them, but they have to be getting promoted, because Astalor never sends the same courier twice. I'm starting to think he sends me the ones that have an attitude on purpose. But hey, no problem with that from this corner.</p><p> </p><p>*Yeah, no. I would never have told you this story for free if I could have charged you for it. Lucky you.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I came to a realization about myself while writing this fill, and how often can I say that? Rarely if ever.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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